Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Before you go to Lady Gaga tonight...

I want you to consider killing yourself or having me do it for you. I'm not insensitive to suicide, I just actually want you to consider it. People wonder why this world is falling apart? What does it say about music when the ERIC CARTMAN VERSION OF POKERFACE is BETTER than Lady Gaga's version? I dont even know what Lady Gaga looks like but apparently she was the token costume for all the Halloween girls who thought they would be original. Yet, it was so original I cant go through a newsfeed without seeing one.

So let's see. I actually dont know anything about Lady Gaga so here's my guess. She's very pretty but she dresses ridiculously slutty and crazy because she wants to rebel against society and "doesnt care what people think." She's just a free spirit that cant be tamed. Like the Sex and the City quote when Carrie gets dumped by Big for a way hotter Bridget Moynihan and instead of wearing it like she's an ugly bitchy horseface like she should have, she has to rationalize it with a trivial quote to stomach who she sees in the mirror each day. Like every girl who does ridiculous things or identifies with any Sex and the City quote for empowerment, you might as well just hang a sign on yourself with all capitals saying I AM INSECURE ABOUT EVERYTHING. Same message, you'll just be cutting through the bullshit.


All the money you spent on a Lady Gaga ticket could have been used on cyanide. That way, you won't only be dead to me, you'll be dead to the world and cease to be a drain to society's resources. You wont have to grow old and waste health care. You wont waste anymore of our oxygen. We can use the food you would have ate to feed 3 homeless people who have better taste in music than you. So yeah, knock yourself out with Lady Gaga. I'm sure she's so original and her music is so good that their will never be another person like her. I've never heard of a girl in the music industry that flaunted social norms to convince people she had good music (Madonna, Gwen Stefani, Amy Winehouse, the bald girl) so yeah, have fun at gaga. i'm sure you'll be telling your kids someday all about it.


Unless of course, you consider the cyanide option instead.

-- Boosh

7 comments:

  1. good advice...anyone who is "into" today's music clearly should not exist

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  2. can't u just let people get out for a nite and JUST HAVE FUN?? harmless FUN..don't knock anybody for that..and don't knock other artists..yes, i said artists..have a nice day PS...also i don't find joking about suicide or takin cyanide AT ALL funny...:(

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  3. dont find it funny? then dont laugh. if lady gaga is an artist by your standards, well, what does that say about you? people wanna go have fun? go play frisbee. don't perpetuate this crap.

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  4. I was mainly referring to Madonna and Gwen when i referred to "artists". Or do u put them in the same category as L.G. and A.W.?

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  5. What is this fascination with categorizing and labeling? Everyone is an individual. We will all have certain similarities and differences. One thing those four have in common is "being rebellious and unique individual" in order to sell more albums. I stand by my words in the post, and will refrain from disclosing whether any of those 4 are artists by an objective or subjective standard. But yeah, it's fun debating someone who hides under the cowardice of anonymity

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  6. HEY LAZAR!
    One thing, she is not attractive actually under that makeup. She's just a weird italian girl. I guess that makes her different from most pop stars?

    GET YOUR FACTS RIGHT, JEFF.

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  7. I LIKE TURTLES

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