I’ll Open Pandora’s Box Any Day

Is everybody using Pandora Radio yet? It may be one of the greatest websites of all time. I’ll go so far as to say it’s up there with Wikipedia, YouTube, and Urban Dictionary. If you listen to music then you should agree. For those of you not yet familiar with Pandora, here’s a brief rundown:

Pandora.com is essentially internet radio that’s customized to each individual user. It’s better than regular radio because it only plays music you like, and there are fewer and shorter commercials. It’s also better than making your own playlists because it takes much less effort and lets you listen to new music and other stuff you’ve never heard. To start creating your own radio station you select an artist or even a specific song that you like. The site then starts playing other music that has similar qualities. You can constantly improve your own station by adding new songs/artists to the model and indicating that you like/dislike any song that plays. Pandora has this thing down to a science. For example, let’s say you clicked “Why was this song selected?” for “Don’t Stop the Music” by Rihanna (umm…this might be a hypothetical example). The site would tell you “Based on what you’ve told us so far, we’re playing this track because it features modern R&B stylings, electronica influences, disco influences, groove based composition, and interweaving vocal harmony.” Sweeeet.

The awesomeness of Pandora got me to thinking: how can this be expanded to other services besides music? My resulting idea was almost TOO brilliant: PandoraMatch.com. (take notes JimmyJames, this could be your next get-rich-quick scheme). Naturally PandoraMatch.com would employ Pandora Radio’s model of matching users to music they like by matching them to singles they could date and/or hook up with. Let’s see how this would work (for the purposes of this example, the user will be a heterosexual dude):

You’d start by naming chicks you had a good experience with and indicating that you like or dislike others: “Like” the girl at Bank of America (great physical shape, nice smile, not too aggressive in trying to sell me shitty banking products); “Dislike” the girl at Subway (she’s pretty nice but I can’t understand a word she says, and she’s less attractive than Jared).

The site would then start recommending other single ladies. While we’re at it, they might as well include photos and a short profile on the site so you can eliminate some without leaving the house. The more you used it, the better PandoraMatch would get. “Based on what you’ve told us so far, we’re recommending this chick because she is age 22-34, has long hair, non-blue eyes, B-cups or larger, is college-educated, and likes Oreo ice cream.”

What are some other features of Pandora Radio that could be used by PandoraMatch.com? Click “I’m tired of this bitch” and the site would keep her in your queue but not recommend her again for at least a month (we’ve all been there). You could also use “Send to a Friend”, like when you realize a chick is jacked and could probably bench press you. “Here you go Rocco.”

- D